Soar
by reaverattack
Summary: This takes place during and after the BDM, so, naturally, there are spoilers. Wash's POV. -ON HIATUS-
1. Death

**Disclaimer: **In which reaverattck proclaims her own patheticness.

**Timeline:** BDM and Post-BDM

**Warnings:** MAJOR SPOILERS FOR THE BDM!

**A/N:** _Serenity_'s ending depressed the hell outta me, so I decided to make myself feel better. This isn't technically non-canonical...

* * *

"-soar." Wash muttered the last word without thinking. He was too distracted by the flash of brown that was coming at him.

"_Ai ya_!" he swore. "What the hell was that!?" He glanced back to see Zoe shaking his shoulder and crying.

"Wash! Wash, baby, we gotta go." Why was she so upset? He was startled to see Mal tackle her to the ground as something else shot past him, barely missing his wife.

"_Ye su_!" He jumped up and ran to the two of them on the ground. "Zo, you alright?" She didn't answer and was dragged out by Mal. Wash knew he had to follow. The place would be crawling with reavers any second now. He sighed and decided to take one last look at the bridge.

He choked at what he saw.

He was sitting in his chair, dead. Impaled by a reaver pole.


	2. Book

**Disclaimer:** Blah, blah, blah. I suck royal hippogriff.

* * *

Wash blinked away tears. He was dead. He looked over at the doorway that Zoe, his Zoe, had just walked through. He was so confused. Was this the afterlife? Was he just supposed to sit here forever? Was he supposed to follow Mal and Zoe? He was fairly certain there ought to be a bright light he could walk into.

He whispered into the empty air, "What do I do?"

"Well, that depends."

Wash jumped about a foot in the air. "Jesus!"

Shepherd Book smiled at him. "Not quite, son."

"You scared me to death, Shepherd." Wash winced at his own wording. "Well, at least I know that with you here, I can't be in Hell."

"..."

"We aren't in Hell, are we?"

Shepherd Book laughed in that slightly creepifying way of his. "No, no, Wash. We're fine."

"Aside from being dead, you mean?"

"There are worse things." Wash doubted it.

Wash got up and stood next to his body, trying not to look at it. Picking up his t-rex, he looked at Book and quietly asked, "What happens now?"

"Whatever you want, really. You can stay in this world and explore or haunt folk, but I don't recommend that. You can't stay forever, and everything you do in this world, even after death, is taken into account. Or, you can go straight to the afterlife. That's what I did."

"What's it like?" This was one of those questions that kept him awake late at night. What happened when we died? How big is space? Is there such a thing as too much vacation? When he got to posing these questions Zoe would roll her eyes and tell him not to overwork his brain. Wash felt a pang in his chest. Zoe.

"I can't tell you that."

Wash had figured as much. He knew that it didn't really matter. Even if the afterlife was a place where you could ride friendly dinosaurs and never have to lay eyes on protein again, he wouldn't have gone. He couldn't. Not yet.

Wash looked up at Book and could see that Book knew what he was going to say. He said it anyway. "I'm going to stay."

Book simply nodded before turning towards the door to leave. "You might want to catch up to the group, then. I think they may need you."

Wash nodded and set down his t-rex. A thought struck him. "Hey, wait!"

Book turned again. He was already halfway down the hall. "Hmmm?"

"How _do_ you know all that stuff a preacher shouldn't?"

Wash was slightly annoyed to find out that, even in death, he wasn't going to get that answer. Book just chuckled and disappeared from view.

Wash sighed and made to follow after Zoe.


	3. Grief

**Disclaimer:** All is owned by whoever owns it... unfortunately not me.

* * *

If the situation weren't so serious, Wash would've spent some time enjoying his new-found ability to walk through walls. He thought it was shiny that he could choose to pass through things and touch other others. But, now, Wash's mind was on other things.

He walked into the room in time to hear his jumpsuit buddy ask about him, panicked, and to see her eyes water when she was told that he wasn't coming. It broke his heart.

The tears in Kaylee's eyes.

The fear in Simon's face.

The shock in River's expression.

The anger in Jayne's jaw.

The grief in Inara's stance.

The conviction in Mal's voice.

The pain in Zoe's.

Mal went to deal with the operative. Wash stayed with the rest. He felt a fear within him that he had rarely ever felt, know that his wife, his whole family, was protected from Reavers by nothing but crates against a door and some grating. He was sure that he and Book were not to be _Serenity_'s only deaths.

* * *

Wash knew Kaylee was going to die when she took three poisoned darts to her neck. He knew River was going to die when she dove through the blast doors. He knew Zoe was going to die when she became too preoccupied with vengeance and got her back slashed. He had screamed. They were all going to die. But they didn't. They had survived.

Wash had tried to help, but was dismayed to realize he could only touch certain things, and only at certain times. The rules seemed random. Even if he could have done more, he wasn't sure he would've made much of a difference. Whenever a Reaver had come close to him, Wash would tense up and freeze in fear. He realized how _ben dun_ that was; he was already dead. But, if anyone could manage to die twice, it'd be him. Or Mal. Probably Mal.

But they had made it. Even Mal. They were broken, but alive. Well, not him, but still... The message was released, they were set free, and the dead were buried. It was strange, attending his own funeral. He was honored that they had left his dinos on the bridge. He helped Mal and River on their first flight off of Mr. Universe's moon. Things were back to normal, aside from him and Book.

But, people managed to put on a good face. They did their best to move on. Inara had stayed. Simon and Kaylee had _finally _gotten together. They were all healing. Except Zoe. She didn't smile. She rarely ate. She slept in his shirts and wore his cheap cologne. It hadn't been long since Miranda, but Zoe was only getting worse. Wash had to help.

He had to get noticed.


	4. Waterworks

**Disclaimer:** Joss rules, I drool... but only on occasion.

**A/N: **It was like pulling teeth, writing this one.

* * *

Wash figured that the best way to get noticed was to move something, but he wasn't sure Zoe was ready to know about his supershiny, yet creepifying status as _Serenity_'s resident ghost. So, he decided to get the rest of the crew used to the idea first. And have a little fun while doing so.

That's why he was in Mal's bunk. Wash waited until Mal was calm and comfy and situated in his bed with a nice book. Then he turned the sink on.

"_Qing wa cao de liumang_!" Mal cursed, jumping to his feet and turning off the running water. Wash then waited until the captain was again comfortable in his bed before turning on the water once more. He stifled back a laugh, even though Mal couldn't hear him. "What in the hell?" Mal hopped up again.

The third time, Mal didn't sit back down. He just stood there, glaring at his sink with narrow eyes and pursed lips. Wash turned the water on. Mal turned it off. On, off, on, off, on... Wash didn't let him turn it off this time. He put both of his hands on the small handle and pulled. Mal did so as well. It became a full out battle. Wash won, and was mildly astounded that they didn't break the sink.

"Gorramit!" Mal stalked over to his com unit and ran his fingers through his hair, frustrated. "Kaylee, can you come down to my bunk? My sink is acting up."

"_Shi de_, Cap'n. No problem." When Kaylee showed up with a box of tools, Mal sighed in relief and Wash chuckled. "So, what seems to be the problem, Cap'n?"

"It's jammed, won't shut off," he answered pointedly.

"Hmm..." Kaylee experimentally turned the handle. Wash didn't stop her. The water turned off. Kaylee looked questioningly at Mal, who was sputtering about 'loosening it' and looking perplexed. Wash just laughed and exited the bunk.

* * *

**A/N #2: **Review with any pranks you want to see Wash pull!


	5. Butterfingers

**Disclaimer:** "Rawr" is dinosaur for reaverattack owns nothing.

* * *

Wash found himself in the infirmary, sprawled on the chair bed, just relaxing. He no longer had to sleep, but often found himself mentally exhausted and in need of a little shutdown time. So there he was, laying peacefully down, when Simon came in and began to noisily rummage through drawers, eventually pulling out a syringe.

River followed behind and plopped herself onto the chair. Wash's sight suddenly dimmed. Was he... inside her? He cringed. River giggled as he moved off of the chair and across the infirmary to lean against the counter. River smiled down at her as he prepared her shot.

"She's a cloud..." she whispered, still giggling. He wasn't paying much attention. He was trying to figure out how to get the syringe out of Simon's hand without him noticing. He decided on stealth and walked up. He swatted the thing out of the young doctor's hand.

The expression on Simon's face as the syringe went spinning... There was no way to describe his perplexed look. Wash laughed aloud. River dramatically sighed while contorting her face, trying not to Simon her laughter, Wash assumed. "Simon is a butterfingers."

Simon opened and closed his mouth a few times, looking nothing so much as a surprised fish. As River traipsed out of the infirmary, Wash knew exactly who his next victim was to be.


	6. Talents

**Disclaimer:** No propieto la programa.

**A/N:** I would've gotten to this sooner, but the muse has ADHD. So instead of updating, I've spent the last week writing various oneshots, some of which may or may be posted. So, without further adieu...

* * *

Wash stood in the cargo bay, leaning on a crate. He watched River twirl and kick, gracefully dancing. The most graceful thing he could do was juggle. That and shadow puppets. Were shadow puppets graceful? He supposed it didn't matter, seeing as he no longer had a shadow.

River finally paused to catch her breath. Wash saw his opportunity and crept up behind her, only to have the _guai_ scared out of him.

"Don't you dare," River lightly trilled. She turned and looked into his eyes, which was pretty creepifying. Wash didn't have eyes anymore. She couldn't know he was there. It was impossible. River laughed.

"Wash seems to be forgetting the girl's talents." She looked at him expectantly.

"What?" he asked aloud. Maybe if she could see him, she could hear him, too.

"Doesn't see you. No body to see. She can hear you, though."

"What?" he parroted himself.

"You are loud."

"How do you know I'm...?" Here? Present? A ghost?

"You are forgetting her talents. Your body is an annelidial feast, but your mind is present and intact."

Oh! River read minds... Wash used to think it was creepy. Well, he still did, but it wasn't any creepier than being a ghost. Besides, it could come in handy. He could actually speak to everybody if River acted as his... other worldly mediator? Yeah, that sounded pretty cool.

"River? Could you help me out? Be a-"

"Translator? Yes, she concedes. However, there is a condition with which you must comply."

Great. That changed pace real quick. Now the crazy girl was in charge of him.

River scowled and kicked the empty air his shin was occupying. "Not crazy."

Right. Mind reader. "Fine. What do I have to do?"

"Stop avoiding Zoe. She needs you. Sudden departure, cold turkey. She must slowly wean off the drug."

He paused, trying to process what she said. "Did you just call me a turkey?"

She rolled her eyes. "The husband left the wife too suddenly. He must leave at a less rapid pace."

Ok. "So I have to... let Zoe know I'm here?"

"Precisely! Also, no more pranking."

What! No! "But I have this great thing lined up for Kaylee, where-"

"No pranks."

"Yeah, but, tonight at dinner, Inara and Mal-"

"No. Except for the mercenary's prank. It is comical and well deserved."

Huh. He was surprised out of his thoughts when she closed the short distance between them and hugged the air where he stood.

"She is sorry he died. She didn't mean for you to go." She sniffled.

"Hey, it's ok." He awkwardly patted her back, only partly sure she couldn't feel it.

"It isn't. Dysphoria, sadness, pain, grief. She is sorry, so sorry."

Wash was surprised. He had never blamed River for his death. He had blamed the Reavers and the _ma de _Alliance. Besides, their Miranda escapade had been a success, overall. The word was out and the Alliance was steadily losing power.

"It all worked out though didn't it?" he prompted the girl crying into his chest. Well, kind of into his chest. "Inara's back. Simon and Kaylee are together. Jayne has a bottle of booze. Everyone's happy."

"Not Zoe."

He sighed. "She'll get over it. She can't miss me that much, anyway." River looked up at him, questioningly. "I snored." His reasoning elicited a giggle, and River stopped crying.

"River?" Simon called. River broke the hug and turned to her brother. "Who are you talking to?"

"Wash."

Wash spun to face River. "What are you doing?" He got no answer. Oh well. It wasn't as if Simon would believe her anyway.

Simon sighed and gently shook his head. "Wash is gone, _mei mei_."

River shook her head in return. "Dead and gone are not necessarily synonymous. Your cognitive processes are riddled with fallacy, _ge ge_."

"Alright, River, let's go." He held out his hand and she joined him and took it.

"River, wait!" Wash called. She turned despite Simon's grip on her hand. "Would you like to help me prank Jayne?"

She grinned. "The girl would enjoy such bonding, thank you." Much to Wash's amusement, Simon's brow wrinkled in a confused and very unattractive way.

"Talk to you later, River."

"Bye, Wash!" she called, beaming and waving.

Wash chuckled.


End file.
